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No Shame, No Gain

I recently heard a twice-divorced woman describe herself as a “two-time loser.” Ouch. It got me thinking about just how embarrassing it is to end a marriage.
When we talk about the emotional journey of divorce, great epic feelings like Pain, Fear and Loneliness tend to hog all the airtime. But I think embarrassment belongs right [...]

Stand by your… ?

I saw a crazy thing on TV the other day. A decade or more into marriage, the husband decided to switch genders and fulfill his lifelong yearning to live as a woman. The wife stood by her partner through the whole transition (yes, surgery), and at the time the segment was taped they were living [...]

One to ponder…

My friend Martha divorced around the same time I did. We didn’t know each other then, but wound up neighbors after we both moved from our Marital Estates into sensible little easy-care townhouses.
As we became friends, Martha inspired me: She ran her own business. She biked to the gym every morning. She grew her own [...]

Umm… Congratulations?

Umm… Congratulations?
People often wonder about the appropriate response when someone gets divorced. I’m in the camp of a resounding “mazel tov!” A congratulatory exclamation of warm wishes and good luck makes every kind of sense as a rough chapter closes and a new one begins.
I am not insensitive to the sadness and pain that [...]

Make Some Noise

If you’re like me, you’re reading a stranger’s divorce blog because that’s a whole lot easier than talking about the subject with your friends. But I hope you’re not like me, because if there’s one piece of advice I’d like to foist on the unhappily coupled (or uncoupled) of the world, it’s quit brooding [...]

The Ex Games

I’ve got a problem with the phrase “my ex.” It might just be that it makes me feel like a character in a bad country song, but I think there’s more to it.
It’s the “my” part that bugs me. I prefer to reserve that descriptor for the positive things I cherish: my family, my friends, [...]